Monday, April 19, 2010
Laugh it up fuzz ball!
I have been reading a lot about other Prequel rewrites. There is a lot out there. Some of it is pretty good, some of it terrible. Some people take it to a whole other level! This made me very happy!
This is a portion of my favorite so far! I'd like to thank Jonathan Wojcik a.k.a. Scythemantis for reminding me not to take things so seriously! Gotta laugh!
Six year old Anakin Skywalker steps outside to do his desert planet chores like planting water seeds or milking lizards or some dumb thing when suddenly a Jawa Sandcrawler pulls up in his front yard (doing this totally sweet donut in the process) and all of the Jawas just start pouring out of it, like buckets of fucking Jawas flying out in every direction and start beating him with mangled droid arms. They bust into his house and fuck everything up. He has to watch them trade his hot mom to Jabba the Hutt (who is all making out with her and shit in front of him) in exchange for this bitching awesome hat (it has LED lights that spell out "SLUTS" in Jawa talk) and keep Anakin around to scrape off sand barnacles or whatever space problem you get when you drive Sandcrawlers. Over the course of eight years he pieces together Threepio from droid scraps to keep his sanity but the Jawas find the droid before it even gets turned on on and they sell it to some space guy who uses it . Anakin gets so pissed that he goes and gets the awesome hat and he punches this big hole in the top. The Jawas are so mad they throw him in the sarlaac and he is digested for 1,000 years in horrible pain. SPOILER: he was not that Anakin Skywalker!!
Bogleech.com This is Jon's site. Excellent information on strange stuff!
Scythemantis on Deviant Art
Not to mention, how cool is this? One of Scythemantis' many collections.